Two weeks ago saw me returning to the working world for the first time in six years - before Holly was born, when we emigrated to America. I have been so fortunate to be able to stay at home with my two and be such a huge part of their lives whilst they have been little but I was more than ready to put myself out there again.
It has been a difficult decision to make and I'm sure any woman who has taken time at home with their babies will have the same thoughts as me - am I ready? Will I miss the children to much? Can I cope? Will I do well? Will I get along with my colleagues? Can I even form decent adult conversation anymore? The latter has yet to be decided.
Further to this, I have also had to consider whether I can hold down a job at the moment - it's been a long time since I sat down and focused on one thing solidly for longer than a few minutes, having had to jump from one thing to another as the children have demanded it. I wasn't sure if my illness would allow me to focus for long enough to be any good at anything.
|It's not always easy but we try to laugh!|
Due to my illness I have started back on one day a week and have been really lucky to find a company who were looking for just the hours I needed, doing a job I know I will love. I have been looking around for about nine months now and I was prepared to wait until the right thing came along, and it did. In fact, until it did, I was still back and forth about whether returning to work was the right thing or not. However, my new boss is flexible with the hours, and understands my illness and that I may have to change my days if I need to.
Yes I am only two weeks into the role but already I can see a huge change in myself. I am feeling so much more positive from a month prior, I think just getting some satisfaction from my day is incredible. And the self worth I feel that I can contribute to a company successfully AND bring home a little money at the same time makes it all worthwhile.
For any mum out there who is considering dipping your toes back into the working world I would say, if you can, give yourself time. Don't rush in and go for the first thing that comes along, and really think about how many hours you are prepared to give to a new company, as that is precious time away from your family. On the flip side, though, those hours are also time to reclaim yourself and your persona, to become a person alongside being 'mum' and to take those tiny steps back into a life you knew before you had children. Whilst our babies are our blessings, it is easy to be swept away by motherhood and forget who you are without it. Once those special early days are behind us and we become overwhelmed with nappy changes, early hour wake up calls and never-ending piles of laundry, it is important to take some time for ourselves and recharge. I am doing just that and I am celebrating every moment.
Always keep dancing.